Love as a complex subject

Ok today I just decided to talk about love, a sensitive subject which always gives me horripilations. About my relationship with love, and not only love but romance and all those emotional feelings that come with it.

I love love, I yearn for that feeling. It’s a truly heavenly and pleasurable feeling to love and feel loved. But i just can’t experience that.

See i love women and the best thing done to me was by a woman. But am just scared to love because sometimes i don’t really know what to do and tell her, so i just hide in my man cave.

Through my relatively small experience with love, i’ve learned that you just can’t choose who to love. Is it the lady who quickly gives you her number, or the one who plays hard to get?

Sometimes you can take a girl out, she is cute and you had the best time together, but you just can’t like her.
I think the grave mistake i make is to think with my brain but not with my heart.
I normally create a checklist and after crossing off most of the items, i propose a date. But what happens after is just not love.
I start calling her because that’s what i should be doing not because i want.
Some weeks down the road, it becomes strenuous and that’s when you wake up and she texts “it’s over” out of the blue.
Then you end up feeling sad and blame karma for being a little bitch.

So for now am not going to take on a lady regardless on how pretty she is, unless i’m so sure that i like her which happens once in a blue moon.

“love is a beautiful feeling, love is sweet” that’s what people say but i think i should add “falling in that beautiful feeling” to my bucket list.

Am waiting for that moment when i will not tire to call, not see her text messages as a bother. I always want to hear her voice, a smile on my face when i pick up her call. Now that is LOVE!

If am to ever fall in love, it will take some time, and she has to be patient because it is not all about my feelings, but also hers. I don’t want to wake up and i read “it’s over” on my phone, yet the previous day all seemed well.

I recently met some girl, i’ve already gone out for a date and i think more are to come.
Am still not in love with her but i think i like her already.

Wish me luck.


About silwaxxy2013

Civil Engineer in the making, moved like a kite in the wind
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