Simplicity is the ultimate sophiscation said Leonardo Da Vinci.
You will need this at the end.
Of late I frequent bars for reasons best known to all but as I sit in the corner and sip the only beer with a harp device, there is always that couple that is whispering sweet nothings into each other’s ears.
Their new found love is pure and similar to that in a romantic novel. In my few dating escapades i’ve heard phrases like “It’s my first time to go out with someone in a year” and “I wish you knew how many rich pot-bellied men I’ve turned down because of you”.
We men equally tell lies because if you are not familiar with the words of seduction, you will not get sum’n anytime soon.
But all these are rules of the game, a game humans have perfected to lure the opposite sex.
For the infinitesimal times I’ve attempted dating, I’ve noticed some acts that are just fable…..scroll on.
Composite Synthetic Fibres
This is what a layman calls a weave. These come in various colours like yellow, orange, red, pink.
When they first came in black, I thought they had stretched the joke a little too far but when the other rainbow and peacock colours came into the market, the joke ended.
I pity men who sleep next to these, and keep respirating through them (i mean the fibres).
I have a specific aversion for women who wear them, it leaves little for the imagination and when a man looks at a woman without imagination, that woman better be worried.
“Get me wine”
When I hear this from a lady, I locate the next door that is familiar to the word exit. My research has shown that a woman’s fanciful taste is normally dictated by the financial position of the gentleman footing the bill.
I need extra time to comprehend why anyone would to a bar or a club to have wine. It seems I missed a lecture about when to take wines. I excuse those ladies who went to international schools for all I know, they might be taking white wine after their supper (which at times is a rolex).
At a dinner, cocktail or at home, it’s understandable but in the, middle of of sweating humans dancing to sitaki and you whisper “wine” in my ear! It’s unreasonable, uneconomical and brainless.
It can’t hold any sense to an intelligent and straight man.
Gabriella Suarez’s body language and language
I have to give it to whoever introduced these soaps to our local tv stations, this guy deserves a medal for capturing all females to their tv’s and making housegirls serve burnt food.
The issue I have with these soaps is the gained deceptive and subtle accents that are allover the place. It sucks more if it’s blended with one’s native accent. I have to admit I like her more if she has, fluent english.
And for the body language, this has gone too far, pulling back of the hair and having some mild frown. It’s very sexy when Jessica Alba does it but it’s because her hair was made for that, unlike your hair extensions which were made in a chinese factory. And return those not so amusing facial expressions to the tele, natural is sexy.
Am sure everyone has watched that coke advert where the babe is silenced by the guy in a bar.
This attention seeking behaviour of wanting to associate with the beautiful game is unbearable.
It’s ok if you don’t understand soccer, some of us don’t get soaps but you don’t see us going to see what happened next.
Making noise unnecessarily might make us drop our bottles thinking our team lost.
So I guess this is the reason why Leaonardo still remains my best philosopher of all time. This man had visioned that people would be immitators in generations to come.