On Loyalty and Other Musings

Whenever i engage any friend of mine in a conversation involving the opposite sex, they always dislodge it and associate it with religion, very complex and mysterious.

One man once wrote a book about what we knew about women and guess what….it was blank. That shows you how much we know about our dear sisters.
I have to give it to girls who strive to be honest, truthful and faithful in their relationships, but this was written for those who carry lies in their big handbags.

I’ll say a few i’ve heard

I have slept with only one guy
I don’t even know why men even ask how many males she has been with before them. She will tell you atmost 2 guys. See, even if she has slept with 300 men, she can tell you 3, it’s just a matter of removing 2 digits. They tell this lie to boost your ego so that you count yourself among the chosen few….kumbe.
So next time she says that small figure, don’t question otherwise you will be astonished by the results.

“Yes, I have had sex but you belong to another planet”
If she tells you this and “World’s greatest” by R Kelly is playing in the background, just shoot the speakers. Almost every woman will claim that her dildo didn’t even make it to the boxing ring when fighting for an orgasm with you.
It’s hard for most women to be bare-faced about sex, especially when they see a future with you.
You are strongly advised not to rely on her tongue but rather on her body language, is she pulsating…..then you can go back and repair the speakers.

“I usually don’t give out my number, so count yourself lucky”
After hearing this, guys tend to feel so special and go bragging how they got a treasure made for a few worthy men. Hehehe the truth is that you are number 3,274 on that list to be accurate. So don’t let that lie get into your brain and start feeling all that special.
Know the reason why you got that number and execute it.

“I will be ready in a minute”
You plan on a date with a cute female and you agree at 7pm to go and pick her.  When you get there and she’s like “i’ll be ready in a minute”, tell her you need to grab some airtime at the nearest kafunda.
Go back home and play that latest episode of Suits, when it’s about to end, she will send a text asking why you took long. Drive back (or get a boda) and you will be in time for the date.
Thank me later.

To the loyal ones, a toast to kashera
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About silwaxxy2013

Civil Engineer in the making, moved like a kite in the wind
This entry was posted in Life, Women. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to On Loyalty and Other Musings

  1. I must say you are right on almost all those things and am really amused. I didnt know the big handbags we own are for carrying lies then again can the number truely get to 3274…hehehe by the way no man can ever be happy knowing the girl they are interested in have slept with over 50 guys, so the lie is magical.

    Liked by 1 person

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